5 miraculous years

Today I became the mother of a 5 year old. It's is truly unreal how time goes by. I can still remember things from the birth to an 8 day stay in the NIM and NICU to the first Christmas. But yet somehow 5 years have still passed.

We are so truly blessed and for those who are new friends just flowing this blog probably don't know why.

Tyler is a very special young boy, just as I always new he would be, that had a bit of a rough start. From the moment he appeared we knew something wasn't right. He couldn't catch his breath and get breathing regularly. With some help from many NICU nurses and a NICU C-NP he got under control. Well after being up for about 48 hours with oh only about 45 minutes of sleep, I did not pass up them taking him to the nursery so I could sleep.

When I woke, I didn't hesitate and asked for my baby right away. They let me know they have him a bottle (they hadn't wanted me to nurse yet due to the breathing difficulties) and he was a little fussy. Normal right? When I sent him back to take a shower (finally!) again fussy and still some breathing trouble. After aloud friends and family came to see us (okay they came to see Tyler) again they took him for vitals. At this point I finally started to worry. They were taking him to NIM for the night per the MD on staff to be monitored more closely.

My poor baby. What a fought night he had. He was beside himself. He would not feed so they placed a feeding tube in his nose. He fussed and cried all night long and was so inconsolable that when the nurses himself couldn't calm and soothe him the doctor himself sat in NIM and rocked my baby.

The next day we were allowed to visit him in NIM but they weren't ready to let him leave there yet. This was hard as I still felt like I'd been run over by a train and had to have help getting to and from in a wheelchair and could not sit for long. After returning to my room for lunch sometime later we got the call. His breathing is STOPPING! They were moving him to the NICU to be placed on a C-pap machine to regulate his breath and keep air on his lungs. Having a number sleep apnea family members I knew that was not good.

Again we were allowed to visit in the NICU and hold him and then....then came the seizure. I tell you it is one thing for you newborn full term baby to have some breathing issues, I can deal with that. But to watch a child you have bonded with for nine months turn blue and purple - well there are no words. Everyone rushed to him and we had to go :( NO! I didn't want to leave my baby, he needed me surely. But we had no choice but to return toy room and await a call.

They got him under control but there was no way he was leaving there now! This began a frenzy of putting my baby thru a number of tests. Blood draws, MRI, MRA, CT scan, more blood draws, heart ultrasound you name it! In the mean time that nite he had 4 more seizures and all we could do was wait for the test results for answers.

On the positive note we finally got an answer, but the news you would never expect. Diagnosis: stroke in utero or at birth (the couldn't be sure which). A stroke? My BABY had a stroke? Seems so odd. We were able to meet with a couple Helen DeVos specialists - Neurology and Hematology. The neuro doc had come to explain what they suspect happened. Apparently a piece of my placenta during either labor or birth had broken off, traveled thru the cord, thru his arteries then getting lodged in his brain. Some pretty scary news. What does that mean? Will he be alright? I just want to take my baby home! (At this point I had been discharged, sent home with out my son)

Hematology was in the picture to run some anticoagulant tests and ensure there was no clotting problems. In the meantime into we had more answers he would stay monitored I the NICU receiving fresh frozen plasma treatments, phenobarbatol for the seizure, fluids, antibiotics and who knows what else! There were several tests and they took days to come back. And they one came back one or two at a time.

I spent all day every day with him at the hospital barely even leaving his side to pump or eat, but sometime I didn't have a choice. The wonderful nurses made me. He quickly improved losing his C-pap and me FINALLY being able to feed him a bottle! As more tests returned and he continue to remain stabilized he was moved back into NIM. This was a grilling day as I knew it meant were getting closer to going home!

Eight days later I arrived forum daily visit. The Peds doctor happen to making his rounds and I patiently waited for him to reach Tyler. He greeted me as usual (he was such a sweet man) and as he reviewed Tyler's chart he looked up at me and said 'Let's see what we can so to get this guy to go home today'. I was beeming - I wanted to wrap my arms around him, fall on my need and thank God. He had the hematology specialist rush the results down himself and consult with me for clearance. They scheduled his circumcision. They sent me for CPR class (because of the seizures) and I could wait to call Allen to tell him we could bring our baby home!

I didn't hesitate to do any of it including packing up and getting Monkey dressed to go! Allen had his mom drive him up so we didn't have two cars. We said our finally good byes and thank you's to the NICU staff and left there for hopefully the last time.

This was the end of course. He still required Amit-seizure meds and follow ups with specialists but we were going home. And no sooner did we get on the freeway and what do we hear play "Mama I'm comin' hoooome!". It was meant to be.

sticky fingers

It's here. The time in a young child's life where they start asking about going to Disney World - and it doesn't seem to end. Even on a morning ride to daycare he says "But I didn't even get to go to Disney and see Buzz yet". No kidding. I thought he'd forget about, but he's on a kick. Having never gone myself as a kid I decided it was something we should aim to do in the next couple years (I would so rather he be old enough to enjoy and remember it) So of course, on my obsession have found a couple saving ideas to help get us there. I started saving my change on my night stand (only until I could find a large jar) and had a decent pile going. Yesterday I am cleaning and putting laundry away and I notice just how "clean" my table is. Conversation as follows:

Me: "Tyler."
Tyler: "What?"
Me: "Did you see a bunch of change on Mommy's table in my room?"
Tyler: "Yes."
Me: "Well where is it?"
Tyler: "I took it."
Me: "You took it? And did what with it?"
Tyler: "Put it in my piggy bank."

Smart kid. Apparently we had the same idea in mind.....

excuses....excuses....

There are a ton of them and boy is my 4 year old full of them lately. "My leg hurts", "I don't feel good", "I'm tired", "I have a headache" (my personal fav) you name it, he can prolly come up with it! And while there may be times one of these is true, having to hear it ALL the time - I just don't buy it. Who knew this started at such a young age? And at times it's for sure not easy to deal with. Tyler will use these over and over to get out of cleaning up, dinner, and at times even bath time (which he LOVES!) But in hopes that "this too shall pass" I just continue to acknowledge how he is "feeling", then be quick to change the subject and pray that it work. There are times that are harder than others, I just keep hoping this is just another one of "those phases" people always tell you about.

get outta bed, sleepyhead

Saying that mornings have been rough lately would be an understatement. Somehow, someway I got a 4 year old turned teenager over night. Tyler has always been such a morning kid and never had a problem with him getting up early, especially since he's been doing it since he was 2 months. He's been getting himself dressed for probably about a year or more now, and for a while it worked SO well to get up get everything ready, get HIM up and let him get ready while I showered and he watched cartoons. Then we realized he really needed an extra 1/2 hour sleep and that just wasn't going to work any more. But with out the extra time for him to "wake up", all I hear is whining every morning while I rush around to get ready to go. Last week I went in to get him up and he actually said to me "I just want you to leave me alone so I can SLEEP!!!" (no lie) And every morning was something along those lines. Really?!?!?! YOU'RE FOUR! He also has been slowly (very slowly thank goodness) weening himself from naps :( So my hope is that as he loses sleep the easier bed time will get. I sure do hope the morning thing is a phase, but knowing his dad - this could be a long 14 years to come.....

do it or don't do it... there is no trying...

So I mentioned before that Tyler had been ill with a cold virus and ear infection. I always wanted to raise my kids to be good at sharing things.... all things except there cold germs. Sure enough, two days after Ty's Dr appt, I started coming down with the "crud" tuened sinus infection and I am still getting it out of my system! In an effort to feel better, and another goal of mine for 2012, I have decided to make some changes to make a healthier new me. Like everyone else, I keep saying "on Monday I'll start" or "I'll start when I feel better" and reality is I need to just do it! nike.

So the first thing on my list is the look better naked 2 day cleanse. Another good find on my new Pinterest obsession. A simple meal plan that will hit your body's "reset" ton? For only two days? SOLD! Deinately something I could do. It's not the most glamorous sounding meal plan but it's doable. It's day 1 for me and I've made it all the way to my 2nd snack only cheating with one piece of fruit.

On to the "no poo shampoo". That's right. I didn't wash my hair with shampoo today either. I know it sounds absolutely disgusting, but honestly I have had unhealthy hair for YEARS and quite frankly just hate it most of the time. This woman's story is inspiring and has been able to completely recalibrate her scalp and gone a year with out shampoo. I'm not sure I'll be able to make this til I hit a turn around, but I happen to be out of shampoo - what better time to try!

Workouts. There's really no medium - you either love to do or hate to do it. Personally I LOVE a good workout, I just have a problem getting motivated and sticking with it. I have found two things I have vowed to committ myself to. My friend Lynee recently was telling me about doing a 5k (yeah right!) and then about the training program she used to get up to 5k. C25K - Couch to 5k. Literally meant to take you from being a couch potato to "runner" in 8 weeks. Now I am NO runner - but after looking over the program and hearing Lynee's testimony, I thought "I can DO this!". Then after reading a post on myfitgr.com about a new fitness location called "Pure Barre". Even though there is no actual dancing, only using the techniques I am immediately intrigued being a former dancer! (Ballet folks - get your mind out of the gutter) After telling a friend and also fellow former dancer about this place, couple days later she is emailed a Groupon for 70% of 5 sessions there! What luck! Needless to say we immediately took advantage and signed up.

I'm sure this sounds like a lot going at one time, but as once said to me "You have to make time" and the words of my old coach "Go big or go home" and of course Nike "Just do it".

happy valentines day

This year for Tyler's Valentines I wanted to do more than just your run of the mill character card and sucker. So while indulging in my new guilty pleasure (Pinterest!) I stumbled upon the cutest idea complete with free printable. It was pretty inexpensive and quite easy (slightly time consuming) and totally worth it. I am quite pleased with my self and very happy at how they turned out. Can't wait to see what I find next year!

show n tell

Last week Tyler came home with the Show N Tell bag from school. I'd like to say its his favorite thing but in all honesty there is NOTHING he doesn't love about school. This was his third time for Show N Tell so he knew the drill, pick 2-3 items to share with the class. Normally I help him out picking out what to bring (he has his favs so tends to pick the same thing) but he has been such a Mr. Independent when he took off with the bag to his room I decided to leave him alone. About 10 minutes later he come out, bag in tow, and I open it up.... "I emptied my whole top shelf in there Mama" he says. Sure enough... I couldn't help but just laugh.....

fashionably late, but I'm here....

Well I have set a lot of goals for myself for 2012 (probably too many per usual) and one of them is to blog more. So, an entire month has seemed to have passed my by and not one single blog? Clearly went way too fast. Onward and upward....

Saturday night Tyler began a cough and by Sunday night had turned into a lovely "barking" cough accompanied by fever. Lovely. Monday morning he wakes at up 5:30 am hacking up a lung (after I've already listened to him cough his poor little lungs out all night) fever still there. No work for this mama and no Miss Sandy's for Ty. I shouldn't complain, we've been blessed that this is his first time catching something all cold n flu season. Thankfully his doctor had an opening first thing that morning. Sure enough: ear infection accompanied by nasty cold virus. I am also thankful my kid can take cheapo amoxicillin because we were starting a round right away. After a 3 hour nap, he perked up and it was already beginning to break up. So happy - can't stand when little kiddos are miserable. Hopefully I have a normal monkey with a few days!